Me and this blog

I am an American Expat living overseas away from my family and friends. I am a “what if” type of person and moved to this country only to be with my husband who I felt I could not live without. We have been married for seven years and have a four and a half year old daughter. I am a stay-at-home mom, while raising our daughter and adjusting to this life that seems to take forever to get used to. My husband has always known what I have given up for him in order for us to be together, but as the years went by, that was no longer a focus for him.

I didn’t discover my husband’s secret by accident, it was something I had been questioning over the previous seven months and I just didn’t have the proof to back it up. A chance click on his computer, delivered his affair onto my lap – information so reviling that my heart sank down to a level where it had never gone before. A single email to and from one another revealed his infidelity. That was on November 29, 2007.

This blog is a complete record of my struggle while facing infidelity head on and learning to cope. I’m slowly recovering, although having to do so alone as my H still doesn’t seem to “get it”. After six months, he is starting to come around but very slowly. He still doesn’t understand that he needs to own up to what he has done and in turn we need to work together on this marriage in order to repair it.

When I first began writing this blog, I found that writing through what has/is happening, has helped me a great deal. It has helped me sort out the things that have happened, in order to see them for what they really are. In the process, I have learned that I am 50% responsible for the marital issues we had prior to,but I’m in no way responsible for the affair he chose to have.

As time has went on, I have begun to question infidelity itself and the impact it has on the betrayed spouse. An interesting fact I’ve learned is that most affairs resemble each other very closely. The words, actions, attitudes, and beliefs of the wayward spouse come from a common script.

For those of you who are also struggling, know that your fellow betrayed spouse here knows exactly what you are going through. I hope this blog helps you with advice you may be seeking or a form of comfort to know you are not alone.

How to read this blog::

I have come up with a easier way to read this blog. For those of you who are interested in reading the entire story, I have added a link on the bottom of each post that will take you to the following post. For example, if you start with “how it all began”, which is the beginning of the story, you will then follow the link on the bottom of that page, that will then take you to the start of this blog and you can move on from there.

As you go through the posts, you will notice that December – March are not complete. This is due to the fact that there was so much going on and in order to remember, I audio taped all that took place each and every day. I will get around to writing it all here, so the full story will be revealed eventually.

I hope this helps and if you have any questions, please contact me.